Coping with Grief: Using ACT Mindfulness Techniques to Navigate the Stages of Grief

As a provisional psychologist, I sometimes work with individuals who are struggling with grief after the loss of a loved one. The grieving process involves different stages, which can vary from person to person. However, the stages of grief, as identified by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her book “On Death and Dying”, include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Although everyone may experience these stages differently, there are techniques that can help individuals navigate the grieving process, including Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) mindfulness.

ACT mindfulness can help individuals develop acceptance and mindfulness skills that can be used to manage difficult emotions and find meaning in the midst of loss. Here are some examples of how ACT mindfulness techniques can be used to cope with grief during each stage:

Denial

During the denial stage of grief, individuals may feel disconnected or numb. Mindfulness meditation can help individuals become more present and aware of their thoughts and emotions without judgment. Practicing mindfulness meditation can help individuals become more grounded and connected to their present experience.

Anger

During the anger stage of grief, individuals may feel frustrated, agitated, or resentful. Defusion, a technique used in ACT mindfulness, can help individuals separate themselves from their challenging thoughts and emotions. Visualising challenging (difficult) thoughts as words on a piece of paper can help individuals detach from their thoughts and gain a greater sense of control over their emotions.

Bargaining

During the bargaining stage of grief, individuals may try to make deals or promises to try to change what has happened. Values clarification, which involves identifying one's core values and aligning their actions with those values, can help individuals find meaning and purpose in the midst of loss. For example, if one of their core values is to help others, they can volunteer at a local charity or participate in a fundraiser in honour of their loved one.

Depression

During the depression stage of grief, individuals may feel sad, hopeless, or unmotivated. Acceptance involves acknowledging and accepting difficult emotions as a natural part of the grieving process. Practicing self-compassion and seeking support from a therapist or support group can also help individuals cope with difficult emotions.

Acceptance

During the acceptance stage of grief, individuals may still experience moments of sadness or anger. Committed action involves taking steps towards goals and values, even in the face of difficult emotions. For example, if they value spending time with loved ones, make a plan to call a friend or family member each week. Or if one of their values is to maintain a healthy lifestyle, they can make an effort to exercise regularly or eat nutritious foods.

Grief is a complex and challenging emotion that can be difficult to navigate. However, by using ACT mindfulness techniques, individuals can develop acceptance and mindfulness skills that can help them manage difficult emotions and find meaning in the midst of loss. With time, patience, and self-compassion, individuals can learn to live with their grief and find a sense of peace and healing.